Broken Down Cars and Unwanted Emotions in My Guesthouse of Self

It started out lovely enough: a nice play date with another little boy Finley's age, Ian. I enjoy spending time with his mom too. It is hard to find a good play date match. Do the kids really enjoy each other as much as the parents do or the other way around? Lucky when we find a fit for both children and parents. We enjoy easy, relaxed conversation. The weather was wonderful today after such a long cold spring we've had. It felt hot with my sweatshirt on at the playground. When we went to leave my car wouldn't start. The car I just got back from the shop last week. The car they told me that they could find nothing wrong with. I had them go ahead and fix an oil leak and a leaking water pump, but apparently they didn't catch everything. My good old '89 Volvo station wagon. It has so many miles on it and has really been very reliable and given me little reason to hesitate every time I get behind its trusty wheel. Anyway, thank goodness my friend hadn't left the park yet so I used her cell phone, my battery was dead on mine, to call Mom to see if she could come get us. Thank goodness Mom was home and available and always so wonderful to help. I guess if one has to have car trouble a park with friends and parents living near by is the perfect place!

We went back tonight with Todd to see if we could get it started. He got it to fire once but it died again as soon as he let off the gas. He thinks it may be the fuel pump since it seems as though it just isn't getting any gas or very little. We called AAA to have them tow it back to the mechanic but they were so late that we decided to just deal with it tomorrow. The kids were with us and they were getting really sleepy and the park department guy needed to lock the gate. Finley loved getting to play at the park for such a long time and Evelyn was happy but tired sitting in the Ergo baby carrier. I wrapped a blanket around her since it was getting a bit damp and cool again. We just got home and the kids are both asleep. I am so thankful that the park was close and provided a fun place to hang out even in the middle of dealing with car trouble. It wasn't exactly what Todd and I had planned to do with our evening but, oh well...

So I stole this poem from another blog, http://poem-of-the-week.blogspot.com/ Check it out too! Great idea, a poem every week with information on the poets. I love it. I use it here in my blog tonight as a tie in with my day. Is this not a creative and apt way to describe our experience with emotions? I experience so many emotions every day. I am striving to be more even keel. Not striving for ecstasy every moment; just a middle way of peace and acceptance. Striving to welcome my emotions in, as the poem says, and see them with the eyes of grace and a wider perspective. It sounds strange, but I am trying to not take my emotions so personally. They don't always mean what I think they mean. Isn't life funny?


The Guesthouse

This being human is a guesthouse
Every morning a new arrival
A joy, a depression, a meanness
Some momentary awareness
Comes as an unexpected visitor

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they're a crowd of sorrows
Who violently sweep your house
Empty of its furniture
Still treat each guest honorably
He may be cleaning you out
For some new delight!

The dark thought, the shame, the malice
Meet them at the door laughing
And invite them in
Be grateful for whoever comes
Because each has been sent
As a guide from the beyond


Translated by Coleman Barks



Rumi (Jalal ad-Din Muhammad Rumi) was a 13th century Persian muslim poet, jurist, and theologian. His name literally means "Majesty of Religion". He was born in Balkh (now part of Afghanistan) and died in present-day Turkey. His works are widely read in Iran, Afghanistan, Tajikistan, and are in translation in Turkey, Azerbaijan, the U.S., and South Asia. He lived most of his life in, and produced his works under, the Seljuk Empire. Rumi's importance is considered to transcend national and ethnic borders.